Full of Yesterday

This is where I have been for a while. I've been stuck in "yesterday"-- and I know all about getting out of yesterday, but for a while I haven't had the energy but to only take 1 foot out while the other is still in. 

Yesterday represents the past and the past can be full of happiness or pain, depending upon what glasses we use to look back. We are either yearning for yesterday or mourning in it. Why?

Yesterday is a place for all of us that hurts more that it actually does, and seems way more fun than we actually had in the very moment. 

My yesterdays are full of a myriad of things. Some I can't share because they still sting, and others I wish you could see from my very own green eyes. 

The scariest part of living in the yesterday, is that it's over. But that's also the most beautiful part. Whatever happened, caused us pain, stung, was uncomfortable, makes us tear in the present, makes us depressed, lonely, not motivated, feel stuck, reclused-- it's all contained in "yesterday."

When I look back on yesterday, I bottle the yesterdays in. They eat at my soul. They make me bitter, sad, and feel that I have to overcompensate in other areas in my life. I feel pulled. I want to share my yesterday's pain, but from fear, I keep it close-- don't we all. To bring one into a raw, personal moment can be scary- what if the world isn't ready to read about pain- most only want to hear and talk about joy. But for some of us, we just can't take the other foot out of yesterday. 

Yesterday can also be a longing or yearning for us. We all have moments in our lives that are so special, so beautiful, we share them with others so they can have a piece of our yesterday. Moments we want to re-live, re-love, re-create. Moments we can't wait to share with our friends and family- the people that love us most. So why are we afraid to share our hurt? 

This week, I'm going to be working on moving on from my yesterdays.... the painful ones and the positive ones. I'm going to try to really live presently. I may need to take a hiatus from social media, step away from distractions and find my way. I may need a day off of work, or a moment of relaxation to myself. I haven't figured out yet what I plan on doing. It's important that we take time to live now. 

We have to make the choice to wrap up yesterday, tie it with a bow, and send it upon it's way. For, if we continue to live in yesterday, we will be missing all the beauty around us today.