Week 3: iifym and 31

This week was my birthday. I was thankful I made it another year on this journey of life with Cody. 31 was harder for me than 30. When I turned 30 I was excited and determined that in my 30s I would be on a mommy mission/ a healthy mission/ growing into womanhood mission. Then I turned 31 ans felt like I failed. Not because I hadn't been on the tracks I set forth for myself, but because I didn't achieve what I wanted the most. 

31 has big shoes to fill! I'm looking forward to that adventure and seeing where I am next year at this time!

I'm so thankful I have Cody to rememid me that every time we (my words only) "fail" we are one step closer to our goal-- he's right, and I have to hang on to that. It's funny how life works- I found out that we weren't successful this cycle...on my birthday. Yeah. 

Then I had cake and a bunch other crap that I ate only because that's what I used to eat-when feeling down and out-- and it wasn't even that good, now that I think about it. 

Which leads us to week 3 on iifym. Ugh. I was good part of the week and some parts of days. 

Then some days I didn't eat nearly enough calories because I ate things like: 1/2 a waffle cone from sonic- (don't try it...not worth it) a piece of cake and a scoop of ice cream at a faculty meeting ( wasn't worth it, I really wanted chocolate so why did I cheat with vanila) dinner out for my birthday at a restaurant that was convienent for both hubby and I (he was in galveston and it would have taken him 2 hrs to get home so we just met somewhere) I really wanted, well heck I don't know. Diet coke- and it doesn't even taste great anymore, and lastly pizza. 

I was sick this week, tired, feeling down, it was my birthday and I only calculated some days. It's okay! I'm going to press reset and get back on the ball! 

I am happy to report that my scale didn't go bonkers with all that going on! I only gained a 1/2 pound! Not too shabby for me! 

I revisited my goals page this morning and just as the crisp air blew in over here in BIG A, I am revitalized for a new week! 

I never celebrated my 5 pound loss so today I'm going to do that and buy some pretty new shaker cups for spark and protien shakes! Plus I NEED a Pumpkin Spice Latte with my girl Kel- which hopefully will keep me on track until I reach my 10 lb goal! I think it's good for me to make goals, revisit them and keep them in front of me! It's also nice to have a partner in this and Cody has been a great help cooking and meal prepping when I don't feel like it! 

I am considering (now that I know I'm not pregnant and we are taking a break from fertility meds) doing a 10 day cleanse with Advocare to just get the junks from the past out of my body!

If It Fits Your Macros: Week 2 Results

Week 2 of iifym went pretty good! I definitely learned a valuable lesson: when I'm stressed, my cortisol rises and I eat. I love my job and I'm so thankful for it. If it wasn't for a great learning experience last year, I wouldn't be able to appreciate all the little details at Dayton High. It's a great place to work!

I did have a mild stressor on Friday afternoon. Just normal teacher business, and new age challenges with my special ed kiddos, but it sent my cortisol through the roof. Why I decided a Mcdonalds cheeseburger, some cookies, and a diet coke would fix that, totally not sure! It made it all worse because I felt horrible!

All week I kept in my macros (but I also had a few days where I went a few grams over on fats) and I was determined to stay on track. Every afternoon I had commitments so working out was out of the picture. Then Friday afternoon came and I gave into stress. After work, my hubby steered me back to reality and went running with me - on a Friday. On the 2nd week of school. Yea, all you teachers/school emplyees out there give me props okay!!!

I was bummed since weigh-in day was Saturday and wanted to give in and eat poorly. But I didnt! We ran and then made grilled fish and broiled veggies! Totally not want I wanted but I ate it! My pregnancy hormones had me hating salt this month so that's been hard too! All I want is Italian food or chocolate....great! Lol

Some other cool things I ate this week that cured my cravings were: 

Ezekiel, 1 tblsp Nutella, 1/2 banana... YUM!

But most mornings this is what I usually eat:

For lunch I meal prepped turkey burgers and some days I had salad, some days I had beanitos and fresh salsa, etc:

One night I was craving pizza, so I made mini chicken pizza and it was yummy too. I popped that bad boy in the toaster and voilá! 

Totally worth the 285 calories v. The 2085 from an entire dominos pizza I dreamed of LOL!

This was a good week but I know where I can be better next week! 1. I need to watch my fat intake more. 2. I need to cool down on the after school commitments and appointments so that I can make my 3:30 date with the gym! 3. I need to get a little more sleep! 

I was surprised on Saturday to see a loss! I wasn't expecting it after the cheeseburger rediculous-ness but I am human so... Things happen!

I woke up Saturday to this: 

And you know what- go ME! I'm on pregnancy hormones, I'm in the 2nd week of work, and I ate off plan- and still managed to lose 1/2 a pound from last week! 

With my goal list in mind and meal planing today, I'm looking forward to next Saturday's weigh in! I'm hoping to see 181 but I'll take any loss! As of right now I am down 6 lbs from the start of the school year! 

Another great thing I got to share this week is a moment with a fellow co worker that also has PCOS- she didn't know you could treat PCOS without metformin! 

I told her that I've only taken metformin for about a week my entire life! I've reversed most of my effects and the size of my ovaries ( I know right it's a miracle) with food and exercise alone! (We were talking about why I meal prep and skip the lean cuisines) I told her natural foods of the right type can fix you,  but it takes persistence and patience!

I woke up sick Saturday so I am just now blogging. Thank you Lord for sending me a husband to take care of me, especially since mom and dad are far away! He made me a hot toddy and I woke up a new woman y'all! I did not track what I ate yesterday because I slept the majority of the day and I was very dizzy. But I did eat. 

We had a cheat breakfast this morning at Whataburger since we couldn't go out last night. It was okay, I think I really wanted what I've been craving more- Ezekiel French toast (using egg white and almond milk)! Maybe next Saturday!

Clean eating meal ideas? I eat the same thing for lunch all the time- leave a comment if you have an easy fav! 

If It Fits Your Macros: Week 1 Results

So I logged in to iifym.com (if it fits your macros) and completed my calculations. A few years ago thanks to an online friend, Erika, I finally learned that eating minimal calories 1000-1200 is NOT enough to sustain anyone unless you want to drop weight fast, lose all your muscle first and have extra skin...no? Didn't think so! 

While doing the Jamie Eason live-fit meal plan I do not count calories- I simply eat what my options are on her list. But this summer I hurt my back at the gym and stopped working out....so I added back some already lost weight. (About 10 lbs from my lowest last December). 

I've been following blogger skinny meg on Facebook and IG and after her baby she started documenting her success with iifym! I also follow several others that have had success with it!

Basically, you go to iifym.com. After you calculate your starting weight and goal weight it gives you your BMR (which I believe is your base line caloric intake you need to function) from there you can choose how quickly you want to gain (bodybuilding) or lose!

 It gives you macronutrients needed for the day--and to most womens' suprise it's going to be higher than you think. I've been eating this caloric range since 2012- around September but obviously have eaten more at times too, thus gaining weight! It also gives you your grams needed for weightloss in PROTEIN-FATS-CARBS.

It's a simple equation!  Then head on over to myfitnesspal and plug in your numbers! Now they may not be exact (because myfitness pal calculates in percentages of 5) but you can gage it!  

Go here:

At the bottom go to MORE

 Then goals

Then click on carbohydrates- this will bring up the macronutrients and you can adjust from there, see:

And if you aren't eating .5-1.0 grams of protien per your body weight don't expect to keep hard earned muscle or look toned! Muscle is always the first to go when you eat below your needed amount each day!

So after a fun summer of half working out and half laying around, I started at 186.5 the day before in service.  Then I went back for teacher in service! Of course we had mexican food, greasy burgers, and tons to candy all week so when I weighed in the following Saturday-- I was definitely up 3 lbs 😬 to 189.0

I wasn't going back to the 190s- haven't been there since 2011 - NOT doing it. 

And here's the deal- I can eat 1600 calories of M&M's, Starbucks, Taco Bell, and pizza- but what is that doing for my body? Or I can eat this type of food- filled with protein- and have great results that maintain all my hard earned muscle: 

I stuck to my macros and tried my hardest to get my protein, fat, and carbs on point each day. I took the week off from the gym- because well, it was the first week of school and I was low on energy and my back was hurting. 

Saturday morning came- my weigh in day. I was so curious to see what it would be... And then I weighed in and saw this: 

After 7 days of iifym I lost 5 pounds! That's a great start to something new! Am I proud of that weight? No but yes. I still have about 30 lbs to lose but I'm no where near where I was at my heaviest. I know that number means I have a lot of muscle, a big brain (lol) amongst other things... But it also means I can improve! 

So after our weekend cheat meal, I'm

back to iifym today and excited to see what next Saturday's weigh-in will bring! 

Post questions in comments if you have them! Here's to a new week of fun recipies and healthy meals!

-Annie B

Braving Fertility Treatments Once Again

It's hard to keep fertility treatments and all the stress that comes with it... Inside. No one understands, you want people to, but then again you don't have the energy to explain it to everyone who is rooting for you- because it's exhausting enough in itself... But double exhausting explaining it all over again. I'm still debating if I even want to type all this out... Because I already did once and it was not saved so I lost it. 

We started along time ago in 2011. Doozie of a doctor and a surgery later... We searched for a fertility doctor that honored our Catholic beliefs.  

Caritas Complete Women's Care in Houston Texas opened in 2012 and we began. 

Several months of charting and a 2nd surgery later...landed us to last September- I was (what I think) anemic and was having a lot of bleeding-- for weeks/months at a time. Then I was healed again after surgery! Yay! Thank you God for healing me! Every thing was looking spiffy after my polyps, lesions, and tubes were cleared.

More charting happened and some

grape seed oil progesterone shots several months ago to help my cycles. Progesterone (large amounts of it) is produced by pregnancy- "Progesterone belongs to a group of steroid hormones called progestogens.  It is mainly secreted by the corpus luteum in the ovary during the second half of the menstrual cycle.  It plays important roles in the menstrual cycle and in maintaining the early stages of pregnancy." 

I've had the joy, once again, of feeling pregnant since March, without the baby. Bloating, acne, mega fatigue, mood swings (although I have to say last month could have been worse and I'm proud of myself), an enormous appetite of unhealthy eating, and a confused, very lost mind! (Who leaves their own purse in another state??) yep me! 

Once back on track 100 % with the shots, we started helping my ovaries grow bigger follicles. In 2011 when we did this minus all the charting.. The dr made us feel like all women should have a 28 day cycle and should ovulate on "said"date- duh that's wrong but we were like, OKAY!!?? We will follow your generic plan lol- no success after a few expensive cycles!

Forward to present day: Dr. Karges is so great- she has had faith in my body in the midst of a cry session breakdown in her office and her exact words, "you can give up but I'll never give up on you and your body." 

June came. We stared our cycle with 2.5 mg of femara. Read more about that drug here: it helps make nice eggies to be fertilized since mine are never big enough to do this without meds. https://www.femara.com/index.jsp

My follicles didn't grow to standard and had a mind of their own- in fact I had to stop and find a NaPro dr on my vacation to San Antonio just to get another ultra sound to see if they were ready to hatch :) nope! After the 4th ultra sound they finally were--- and as I always thought... Late! It wasn't until day 18 when I ovulated after my big shot!

Big shot?? We planned also on an HCG trigger shot-- never had one? Imagine being 8 weeks pregnant overnight.... Yeah... No fun! Because it's 10,000 units of HCG in your system. Thankfully this time I did not get morning sickness. I did get cravings. I do every time I take the HCG shot... It's like it's own pregnancy every month you're on them. In 2011 from Oct- Dec it was fried chicken.... In June.... Well, I hate to admit.... It was hotdogs (gross) lol I even ate a movie hotdog and remember it being the BEST thing in the USA! Then went to sonic 5 days in a row and got 1 plain hot dog every day LOL. 

In order to support any pregnancy or supposed pregnancy we continued our progesterone shots on days 18, 21, and 24. They hurt. They take 3 minutes to give, and have to be administered by Cody, in the rear-- I'm sure he just loves that part-- talk about attractive. 

Then the wait. 

2 weeks. Every day I don't start... I think I'm pregnant (finally I thought) then.... Nothing-- I think I'm pregnant. 

Nope not pregnant we aren't sure what's going on. I'm several days late and not pregnant. NOT pregnant- my HCG was .1. That means negative! So we wait. And wait. And wait. Then after a grand total of 5 progesterone shots, 2 more blood draws, 3 more ultrasounds, 10 emails back and forth to the doctor, and 42 days of hormonal hell- well we come to the conclusion it was just a failed cycle. 

My body just didn't want to respond well--- actually I felt pretty good this time around--- but after the 2 weeks wait turned into a 4 week of wait we can now move on. 

I'm sure by now you're exhausted and shocked that I actually ate like 6 hot dogs last month. (Never in my life have I eaten a hotdog-- never.) This post doesn't even contain all the appointments I had, medications I had to remember, and smiles I had plaster on. 

And so now you may understand. It's a lot to repeat all the time to every one. But I know you love me, you're curious, and praying for me often so I felt I needed to get this off my chest. 

For me, moving on to a new month is what I can focus on. A new place, a new job, a new adventure. I have a lot of negative comments I want to say and a lot of people I want to "tell like it is" but I think those are the insensitive hormones trying to peek through. 

It's been a hard month--- heck, I mean month and a half. Today I feel like my definition of Infertility is constantly watching others succeed when you can't- to sit alone and understand that idea...to let that soak in- to be so confused by something such as LIFE...that happens so many millions of times a year (blindly for most couples) and still not be able to mix the perfect concoction to make it. It also means to continue to have Faith in God that he's going to lead you where you shine as a beacon of hope for others. 

Infertility means, even though I feel weak, someone else thinks I am brave. I am grateful for that. I needed to write this today. No apologies.... 

SA Working Vaca: Part II

Today was fun and full of exploring! The alarm went off at 6:30 this morning and we started our day! My morning consisted of follicles and fruit loops--I had a doctors appointment this morning in big ole SA and Cody had to take out the babies and get breakfast! Dr. Karges wanted a follow up ultrasound on one of my growing follicles so I found a NaPro doctor out here and they fit me right in this morning! After the appointment, I came back and the crew was cleaning up the breakfast station....so all that was left was this:

Kid at heart... So it was good! (And sugary) :p

Some kid pushed all the elevator buttons when Cody got on... He looked at the kid and said, "REALLY!!???" When it got to the very next floor the kid took off running! Ha Ha Ha! That's what he would have done as a kid too! I just know it!!

Then I explored the city and got a mani and pedi 

It's really HOT pink but doesn't look like it from the pic! Both definitely needed! 

Cody was home when I returned (2:30 woohoo) so we got ready and headed out to the other four missions in San Antonio- we saw The Alamo the first day but wanted to see the others! We started at San José and it was gorgeous! 

Simply. Breathtaking! Loved this one! We spent about an hour at this mission.

Then we headed to Mission Conceptìon. It was a lot smaller but still beautiful:

It's so refreshing to be in a city and surrounded by your faith! We not only visited, we prayed and spent some time in quiet adoration!

We had to make 1 more mission before the close of day (5:00) so we sped over to Missiom San Juan- it seemed permanently closed but had some neat features, none the less!

Stations in the limestone 

And we ended our visit with a local favorite (per trip advisor) Big Bib BBQ- yum! 

They gave us 3 samples since we were newbies! Loaded potato casserole, sweet potato casserole, and chili beans! 

If you are ever a prisoner- I highly suggest getting the sweet potato casserole as your last meal- to DIE for (no pun intended lol)!!! I ordered it as a side to my brisket sandwhich and couldn't even finish my plate! So delish!!

Never quite looks as good as it tastes! 

It was a good thing we were in the hood- Cody loves kool-aid- made with an entire 5 lb bag of sugar- he had his choice of "red or purple" flavors lol 

(Red or purple is what the people at mcdonalds would call the flavored drinks when Cody worked there- it was always an inside joke between us)!!

Well that's all folks! Chao for now from San An!